In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
-Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968)

It's now or never
Now, more than ever
I need Your strength oh Lord
I need You beside me
walking with me each step of the way
protect me from harm
help me overcome.

I am leaving this place now
letting go of all my fears
saying good-bye to the memory
I hold dear

I've never thought it would be this hard
It seems to be standing alone
Against the cold bitter wind
and as everything is threatened
you become at loss of what to do
what to think
what to say.

I can finally breath again
its a new day fair well past
as I close this chapter
I set free at last

It's come to a cross point
and i don't want to do anything else
than carry out Your plan on my life
so take over Lord
Dictate my life, help me

Chorus
I made up my mind
there's no turning back
the past is behind me
there's no looking back
I'm looking forward not behind-
I've made a decision
I give you my life

No one ever said it's gonna be easy
but i never knew it would be this hard
but even though everyone else says otherwise
i'll still have to go on

Every step I take is new
I found courage to go on
though its rough sometimes
I still have to be strong

Lord, send me Your grace and power
to continue every step of the way
i do enjoy it
and i'll never regret it
but i'm so tired, so so tired.

I may have to walk alone
but the One who live inside
me is always there to comfort and to guide
CHORUS

So as sunlight breaks
as each new day draws closer
i'll continue to pray
and may god fill me
each day
anew

I can see the sun breaking through the clouds
lifting my hands cause I'm all right now
I can shout about it
I can laugh about it
I can talk about it
CHORUS

This is my prayer for today
no matter how much i feel like crying
i'll hold back because there are
better use for these tears
I'll grit my teeth and show them

WHEN GOD IS FOR ME
WHO CAN BE AGAINST ME- romans 8: 31

you're right.
you don't understand me.

but it's fine.
we have a life time to understand each other
what i really don't understand is
why of all times now?

why one night before my IS tech run
no wait, it's past 12
why on the day of my is tech run, i mean.
what is wrong with you
do you think that i'm not stressed enough
about my work and boards

and all the shit i'm given
why even you,
the person who is supposed
to support me the most is doing this to me.
what did i do so wrong that
you just had to say that.
of all times that i've asked and asked and asked.

you promised.
the hurt won't go away just
because i've said forget it
or because YH says pretend,
you've an exam tomorrow.
and what's worst
is this time, we didn't resolve it
something i really hate
but can't face this right now.

i can't take it.
you really don't know how much i
feel like throwing myself
out of the window right now.
if only my window wasn't so low.
i can do without this
thank you very much.

but why,
why do i still love you so much
and miss you
and wish you were here.

Today i've experienced the confusion of love
no wonder people say when there's love
there's hate
i don't know
i really don't know
to let go or not
that's not the question
i'm confused
i'm retarded
i'm everything but happy ever after
i hate this feeling

That’s how much I love you
That’s how much I need you

And I can’t stand ya
'Most everything you do make me wanna smile
Can I not like it for a while?
(No...)

But you won’t let me
You upset me, girl, and then you kiss my lips
All of a sudden, I forget that I was upset
Can’t remember what you did?
(But I hate it)

You know exactly what to do
So that I can’t stay mad at you
For too long, that’s wrong
(But, I hate it)

You know exactly how to touch
So that I don’t wanna fuss and fight no more
Said, I despise that I adore you

And I hate how much I love you, boy
I can’t stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you, boy
But I just can’t let you go
And I hate that I love you so

And you completely know the power that you have
The only one that makes me laugh

Sad and it’s not fair how you take advantage of the fact that I
Love you beyond the reason why
And it just ain’t right

And I hate how much I love you, girl
I can’t stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you, girl
But I just can’t let you go
And I hate that I love you so

One of these days, maybe your magic won’t affect me
And your kiss won’t make me weak
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me
So you’ll probably always have a spell on me

That’s how much I love you
That's how much I need you
That’s how much I love you
That’s how much I need you

And I hate that I love you so

And I hate how much I love you, boy
I can’t stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you, girl
But I just can’t let you go
And I hate that I love you so

And I hate that I love you so
So...

There's really nothing that i can say
or do or think or feel
that is not given by you
All that i want or need is you
There's no words i can say
that can express how i feel

i truly miss you
like the way
a flower misses water
the sky misses the sun
till my it's painful to think about you
till my heart cries

i'm sorry...

Over and over I look in your eyes
you are all I desire
you have captured me
I want to hold you
I want to be close to you
I never want to let go
I wish that this night would never end
I need to know

Could I hold you for for a lifetime
Could I look into your eyes
Could I have this night to share this night together
Could I hold you close beside me
Could I hold you for all time
Could I could I have this kiss forever
Could I could I have this kiss forever, forever

Over and over I've dreamed of this night
Now you're here by my side
You are next to me
I want to hold you and touch you taste you
And make you want no one but me
I wish that this kiss could never end
oh baby please

Could I hold you for a lifetime
Could I look into your eyes
Could I have this night to share this night together
Could I hold you close beside me
Could I hold you for all time
Could I could I have this kiss forever
Could I could I have this kiss forever, forever

I don't want any night to go by
Without you by my side
I just want all my days
Spent being next to you
Lived for just loving you
And baby, oh by the way

Could I hold you for a lifetime
Could I look into your eyes
Could I have this night to share this night together
Could I hold you close beside me
Could I hold you for all time
Could I have this kiss forever
Could I could I have this kiss forever, forever

i'm sorry
i really am
it's so ironic that i was just laughing with you
just barely 2hours ago
I sincerely apologise,
I don't know how many ways
i can say this again and again
before you get pissed and say
forget it or whatever

I know that it's mean of me
to play mind games with you
and from what i've read
guys don't like girls who do
and even though now you say it's ok
i can still feel your disgust and are apalled.

I'm just so scared at times
and I don't want to appear to be too needy
because you said that we're going too fast
i know you said that you didn't mean it
but it has to have certain truth for you
to say it right?
so when i heard your silence
my heart stopped.

I thought you might just sigh and laugh it off
but your brain totally went
shit, no way, mean girls
i can feel it even if you say otherwise
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry

I really didn't mean to
but it's like an addiction
i just can't pull myself away
whenever i'm afraid but
don't want to let you know
then i'll say something
just to make you say that you love me
or to make you worked up
it's wrong
but it's how i assure myself that you won't leave

I'm not sure you know how truly scared i am
just missing you hurts like crazy
thinking about you leaving kills me
i know it's not your fault
you did try try so hard to comfort me
but there's just that little part
that tightens whenever i get reminded
that there's a possibility

and when you get angry
i don't know if you've noticed
but i get so scared that i can't speak
all i can do
is helplessly look at you
and grab on to you as tight as possible
to make sure that you won't run away
but if one day you were to really
break away
i won't be able to chase you
i'd be stuck where i am
and i'd just cry and cry and cry

i'm sorry i'm so paranoid
it's like i'm psychotic
i don't know why i just can't calm
this stupid heart down
that's why i give you everything
that why i want you to be happy
because even though i know
it's not good to make you happy that way
i'm just too afraid that you'll
leave me if you're not

please don't ever leave me with the reason
that i'm too paranoid
if you think so tell me when i'm acting
that way and i'll change
i promise.
i'd rather you be here
than be paranoid

i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
you probably won't trust what i say again
but still
i really do love you
very much.

If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call?
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all?

I never know what the future brings
But I know you're here with me now
We'll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?
If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life?
If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don't know life so far away
But I know that its just a trip
We'll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I'm praying you're the one I'Ve build my home with
I hope I love you all my life

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right
And though I can't be with you tonight
You know my heart is by your side

I don’t wanna run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

this is dedicated to you
after all we've been through in the last
1 and a half months
it's not been easy
but i think that you
make me feel happier each day
that i have you

All I am, all I'll be
Everything in this world
All that I'll ever need
Is in your eyes
Shining at me
When you smile I can feel
All my passion unfolding
Your hand brushes mine
And a thousand sensations
Seduce me 'cause I

You're the only one that can make me
do and feel so much
it's been overwhelming
and the practical side of me
is screaming to stop now
but my heart mind and soul
just can't forget the way you smile

Chorus
I do cherish you
For the rest of my life
You don't have to think twice
I will love you still
From the depths of my soul
It's beyond my control
I've waited so long to say this to you
If you're asking do I love you this much
I do

Sometimes i wonder
if my friends are right
that i don't treasure you enough
even though you promise me
but who can promise me forever
so each second i'm with you
i want you to know how much i love you
how much i'm willing to give
and how much i want you

In my world, before you
I lived outside my emotions
Didn't know where I was going
'Till that day I found you
How you opened my life
To a new paradise
In a world torn by change
Still with all my heart
'Till my dying day

Chorus

so my love,
i heart you.
cheesy as it might seem
i do, cherish you